HAPPY PEOPLE CONTRASTED WITH UNHAPPY PEOPLE
HOW THEY THINK AND WHAT THEY DO

WHAT IS CHANGEABLE OR NOT CHANGEABLE

Changeable (70%)

Circumstances, including looks, intelligence, talent, etc.  = 1/7 (and you have some influence on this)
Factors you can control directly that affect happiness      = 6/7

Supposedly fixed

Genetic happiness set point, items not in our control        = 30% (Originally pegged at 50%)

It can seem an ominous or maybe unachievable task to achieve happiness.  But notice that each of these individual items are changeable and learnable and under your control - and therefore anyone can change their happiness and achieve true happiness!!!!


CONTRIBUTORS TO HAPPINESS

Influencers of thinking - Good philosophy of those around you and good supportiveness

Help others

Stay in balance, so functioning well:
Enough sleep, exercise and nutrition, water      (limit alcohol, sugar ,caffeine,
     self- medication/numbing)  
Quiet the mind (not done by unhappy people!)
See and release tensions early and quickly
   Deep breathing and relaxation very often
Only positive conversations 


Passive victim of "not enough" from "out there"
    Ungrounded, uncentered, wandering
Conditional worth or "no worth" (misconception)
     Compare (and always come out short or...)
Still dependent on "out there", not filled
Try to control others, often with adversity
     Use poor tools - complain
Spend time in distracting, irrelevant, poor payoff
Complain, criticize, punish, not solution oriented
HAPPINESS KILLERS (all are inappropriate actions and viewpoints stemming from incorrect understandings and false beliefs - the unhappy person doesn't do the necessary learning and work to overcome)

   Anger, rage, extreme jealousy/envy
   Right/wrong judgmentalism 
   Blame (solve this and there will be nothing left
        to forgive, no resentment)
   Any negative conversations, repeated...
BONUSES

     Sense of purpose 
Enhancers  
    Learn effectiveness
    Visualize positive outcomes in detail
         Having a set of visualizations ready
    Planning
    Problem solving skills used 
Increase positive inputs ratio, just do these   
Scheduled in life enhancers/creaters:
     What include in a day (15 min meditation, exercise, grounding, frequent rebalancing when out of balance)  
   
Learn, list and employ most effective practices to
    cause happiness
IMPLEMENTING HAPPINESS (See The Happiness Plan.)

Follow an order in which you receive lots of rewards/results early, so they keep you going.
Refine and improve later, once you have the key pillars in place.

For now, you should make sure you do the internal map pieces, as you MUST learn and correct and install those, or happiness is not possible....
HAPPY PEOPLE
  UNHAPPY PEOPLE
INTERNAL MAP, VIEWPOINTS

Responsible for creating one's own life
    Create their own "filling up" emotionally
    Create their own results

    Not dependent, chosen interdependency
    Manage state/stress appropriately - rest
   
       Proactively manage/aware tension 

Accept self as is, with limited awareness
Gratitude - see what I have, don't need alot   
    Expressed daily, "always" viewpoint

Accept reality, actual limits  
Realistic expectations 
Mistakes/failures necessary, simply a "not     
    knowing", signal of need to learn  


"Not responsible" - Approval, happiness, results are
     from "out there"
    Others must fill me up, loneliness, passive, try to            control others to get this, sell their souls
    Dependent, victim
   Inappropriate and ineffective "relief", causes  
      more problems
        Hold stress, unaware, passive victim,
           compounds 
Right/wrong viewpoint, criticize, judge
See what don't have, expecting too much
     Express missing, fear it unrealistically.     
           Unhappiness gap 
Object to reality, wish otherwise, bemoan
Unrealistic expectations, standards, perfectionism
See as "faults" and indications of "worth"

ACTIONS

Actively manage happiness
   Ground and center self (start day with it)
Self-compassion, self-respect, self acceptance
    Not comparing 
Manage their own self care committedly
Not try to control others or the uncontrollable   
    Only put effort into controllable     
Activities - Drop low control, poor results/irrelevant
Act to improve, solve, not explaining
LEARN, FEEDBACK, REVISE PROCESS

Use their higher brains, stay in charge
   Adjust their beliefs to actual - record, re-word,
         install thoroughly  
  Understand basics of how brain/thoughts work,        know thoughts aren't accurate until corrected     Absolute standard of not entertaining negative
         Stop, replace with positive - Must!
Learn what works     
  Know what produces happiness    


Childish thinking, passive victim of emotions, etc.
      Keep old beliefs, not effort, live Groundhog Day             over and over
      Believe brain/emotion controls them
      Experience artificial fears


Too much effort to learn
      Not know, wrong targets (non-productive
RELATIONSHIPS

Carefully match/select partner
Learn what works
Don't rely on other people to provide happiness
Don't resent, honest, make requests not  
    demands


"Fall in love", triggered by fantasy/dependency
Doesn't separate myth from fact
Dependent on other to provide happiness
Operate with more resentment/control