tba
CONTENTS
Choosing between sloth and life
What is the basis for this metaphor?
The results of living this way
The signs that are undeniable
Predictable results
Living a life run by Dumb and Dumber
The better life comes from...
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CHOOSING BETWEEN THE DRIFT AND LIFE
This is one of your 5 biggest life decisions - whether or not to be a gradually boiling frog, floating along in "the drift". While it is a choice one makes, it is not one made intentionally or thoughtfully. And that is the problem - making choices without using one's higher brain doesn't work. It's the formula for failing to live the life you could live.
Yes, it seems to be easier to be a gradually boiling frog in life, but one just ends up well-cooked but not happy or not nearly as happy as one could be.
WHAT IS THE BASIS FOR THIS METAPHOR?
A frog thrown into boiling water will immediately jump out.
However, if one puts a frog into lukewarm water and then gradually heats it up, the comfortable frog in its not noticing what is happening a degree at a time will boil to death without trying to jump out.
THE RESULTS OF LIVING THIS WAY
People will live lives full of tv, reactive behavior (anger, resentment, upset, etc.), stress, bad relationships, distracting addictions, and low payoff and/or harmful activities. Often they never know what they missed or they might even think it was an ok life, but the way they lived was not as healthy (or even healthy, period) or nearly as happy as it could have been.
Most people don’t even know how happy they can be… That is the purpose of this site: to have you purposely create your happiness and your life at the level you want it to be.
Life just drifts along and time seems to disappear...and pretty soon we're boiling. And we're regretting what we missed or feeling remorse or even grief over losing such a life - but we don't acknowledge any of that until we get really old. Before that, though, we do feel a vague sense at times when we have some awareness of missing something. We do sense that this is not the life we wanted to live. But then we stuff it back in the denial bag, dealing with this negative feeling as we do with others, not solving it but trying to ignore it. And the feeling stays in existence, as kind of an undercurrent to life, popping up in a bit of a guilty feeling (I should be doing something better with my time) or a sad feeling (I am missing out in my life).
THE SIGNS THAT ARE UNDENIABLE
There are signs along the way, but the tao of the boiling frog is to not notice them, to not be conscious of them, to even deny them. Some are saved by being hit by a two by four piece of lumber between the eyes - a "wake-up call" (you're going to die if you don't quit x) or a hitting bottom (as in AA, people don't do something unless things get so bad they can't ignore them).
The signs are anxiety, stress, high blood pressure, stiff joints, less strength, overweight, pre-diabetic indicators, sadness, depression, lack of interest. The body is often the best indicator, but the body can take alot of abuse before it shows the signs. The good non-boiling-frog person will look for the signs even earlier.
PREDICTABLE RESULTS
You live a life of violating the rules and predicable results will happen. You'll have the quality of life reduced as you won't feel as good as you could. You'll lose 10 or 20 years extra that you could have had (with good quality) - like flushing life down the toilet because you just had to eat that Twinkie. (See Life Expectancy, which includes a predictive test.)
Some of the pre-indicators are useful "signs" of things to come: eating junk food (putting undigestible garbage and clogging gunk into the bloodstream and body and denying it is a killer. Less energy, enjoying life less, no exercise, a little overweight...
LIVING A LIFE RUN BY DUMB AND DUMBER
If you'll recall, Dumb and Dumber are the two lower brains. (See How The Mind Developed.) They are simple-minded, not logical, don't reason well, loyal, and mechanistic. We can choose to live at the level of an animal (stimulus --> automatic response) or we can choose to be in control of our lives.
Or, as one great guru said, rather rudely, you are just a bunch of mechanical assholes. He was exaggerating (I think?) to make the point that we are letting our emotions run our lives instead of running them ourselves. We feel a little bit of discomfort and anxiety and we must immediately (stupidly) react to quell it. "I just can't not eat that. It's my comfort food" is a great example of the way we operate, but not of the way we have the power to operate.
This is discussed elsewhere, but you need to make a choice: to have your life largely run by Dumb and Dumber or by your higher brain; to be a victim of some things in life or to be able to take charge and make what you want happen.
Your choice.
THE BETTER LIFE COMES FROM...
The better life comes from living an intentional life, a managed one, one created by you on purpose. Surely it is your intention to live a good life, but what we're saying here is to live that life intentionally, on purpose, making it happen rather than being passive about. Taking the bull by the horns, taking the reins, being the captain of your ship, the master of your own destiny - all those old corny sayings put together into one, where you are 100% responsible for your life.
